Have you ever wanted something so badly that simply thinking of it made you feel frustrated or stressed out? Have you ever longed for something so much that it gave you a stomachache? Did you wind up getting what you wanted? I’m willing to bet you didn’t. You either gave up on getting it, or you eventually forgot or simply moved on. Am I right? Well, I’m here to tell you that it most likely wasn’t meant to be. When your desires are coming from your soul—your heart center—the energy you emit is aligned with the universe, and only then will you receive true desires. In other words, the energy of your true desires is the same frequency as the “universal energy”, the energy that makes up all of creation. When these energies are aligned, you are in the flow of things. When you feel like things are simply flowing without major effort, you can achieve anything you want. You know that feeling, for example, when you’re driving your car and you hit a green light at every intersection, and thus, can freely flow down the street? It’s a good feeling, isn’t it? You certainly also know the feeling of driving down the street and hitting every single red light. Usually it’s when you’re already late for something, right? Your energy at that moment is full of worry and anxiety and thus will cause everything to stagnate.
Even though I, as an American, live in Germany with my family, I wanted so badly to get into a US graduate school for psychology. I applied one year and didn't get in anywhere. Then I forgot about it. I let it rest. Moved on. A year later I decided to try again. This time it was without worry, stress and obsessiveness. I applied, and left it. You know the saying, “Let go and let God”? I naturally let go of worrying about the outcome. When I got the letter of acceptance I was completely shocked, because I hadn't had it on my radar at all. Releasing the desire is to release the stress and worry about whether or not it will happen. All that stress and worry acts like a knot in the string of destiny. It clogs things up. Releasing the desire doesn't mean you don't want it anymore. It means you trust that whatever happens is what’s supposed to happen.
Wanting to move back to the USA has been a huge source of frustration and resentment for me. I’ve been living in Germany for over 20 years, and not necessarily because I chose to do so (that’s a story in itself). Constantly trying to become detached from that desire only made me more frustrated and resentful. I'm not quite there yet, but I feel myself letting go of the frustration and naturally detaching myself from the desire. I have realized that sometimes desires are not necessarily right - at least not at the particular time in one's life. Therefore, by realizing that there might be something better for me right now, I am more able to detach from that desire, and know that it's ok if I'm not in the USA, not in my own country, not close to my family. Maybe, just maybe, that's not really what I truly desire right now. What I desire is something that has nothing to do with the geography of my living situation. My truest desires have more to do with what I want to “be”, how I want to live my life, and what kind of relationships I need to be happy. With this understanding, I am able to detach from the desire to live in the USA. Do I still want to live in my homeland? Sure. Do I miss my family? Absolutely. But I am able to detach from that desire without frustration setting in, because I love myself more than the location of the ground I'm standing on.
So, how can we tell what our truest desires are? In other words, how can we decipher between the desires coming from our head and the desires coming from our deepest center of truth? I have had times while meditating where I have achieved a state of shunya. Shunya is an inner stillness that is so beautiful it is difficult to describe. It is pure peace. There are no distracting thoughts or sensations. It is like floating in space; only you want to be there and you are unafraid. Perhaps it is similar to the feeling babies have in their mother's wombs? They don't realize "they" are in their mothers' wombs. They ARE their mothers. There is no "me" in the state of shunya. It is pure connection and bliss. When we truly detach from our desires, we have a quiet comfort inside. We quietly know that our desires are good; this is what is right. There are no worries and thoughts about it. You don’t find yourself constantly making plans, thinking about risks or what might stand in your way. When your desire feels right, you will automatically feel peaceful about the outcome because you will know that it is right. You will know that your desire has already come true. Its manifestation already exists in the universe. It is simply waiting for the time to be right. Knowing this, you rest assured that it will happen. Knowing this, you still work towards your goal, but with a naturalness and peacefulness that feels as natural as breathing.
There are a few things you can do to identify your soul desires and then let go:
Meditate! Meditating allows you to get in touch with your true self. It helps you better hear your inner voice, which is your own personal truth. I see this inner voice, intuition, or whatever you like to call it, as “God’s voice”. With practice you can learn to tune out your critical voice(s) and simply “be”. When you shut out those thoughts in your mind, you learn to listen to your deepest, truest self.
What does your desire feel like? When there’s something you want or desire, ask yourself how you feel when thinking about this desire. Do you feel the slightest worry? Does your mind immediately start making plans or thinking about how to get to the desire? Or do you simply and easily see the desire as it is manifested?
To be or not to be? Is your first feeling, upon thinking about the desire, one of comfort? Does it feel so right that you don’t mind telling anyone about it? Does it feel like it has already happened? For example, if your desire is to become a writer, then I ask you: Do you already write? Then you actually already are a writer. If you deepest desire is to help others, ask yourself, “Am I a helpful person?” If the answer is “yes”, chances are your desire is in line with your soul, your destiny.
Do you care what others think? When thinking about your desire, do you quickly start thinking about what other people will think? Do you contemplate the expectations others have for you? Your truest desire will have nothing to do with anyone in the world. It will not matter in the least what the world thinks (or your dad, mom, best friend or colleagues). You won’t care at all.
Your soul desire is like a key that only fits your door. When you find that key and unlock the door, you gain access to the powerful universal energy, which will instantly align with you to manifest your desires. Knowing that this key belongs to you and only you, it no longer matters what others think, how you will open the door to your desires, or whether it will indeed happen. The key is yours for the keeping. Grab it and open your door of desire!